Hating You, Loving You
by PurpleSummer
Summary: DALTONVERSE. There are times when Logan thinks he actually hates Julian. But deep down, he knows he will never be able to truly hate him, "not even close... not even a bit... not even at all."  JOGAN
1. Logan

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own gLee, Dalton, or any of the characters I used in my fic. I am definitely _not_ that awesome.

* * *

><p><strong>HATING YOU, LOVING YOU<strong>

_I hate the way you talk to me,_

_and the way you cut your hair._

_._

"...will you please _stop_ doing that?" asked Logan irritably.

Julian glanced at him from where he was sitting on the couch of Stuart's common room.

"...doing what, precisely?" he asked back, confused.

"All that... _touching_ your hair! Is that really necessary?"

"So now I can't even _touch_ my hair?" Julian looked at him in disbelief, then just rolled his eyes. "God, Logan, I swear you're getting more touchy by the minute!"

"Well, you could simply avoid doing that every five seconds!"

"Well, as a matter of fact, no, Your Supreme Majesty, I can't. It falls into my eyes and it bothers me."

"Why don't you just cut it a bit shorter, if it annoys you so much?" Logan suggested raising an eyebrow.

"You annoy me too, but I don't kill you," answered Julian calmly. "Besides, I like it like that. You can't tell me how to cut my hair too, Your Majesty."

"Stop calling me that!"

Julian smirked.

"Will do, O Tempestuous One."

"You're insufferable - I hate you."

.

_I hate the way you drive my car,_

_I hate it when you stare._

_._

"..._please_, Logan!"

Logan shot him a brief look before turning back to the road.

"Your beaten puppy look does nothing to me," he said.

"That's because you have no heart," pouted Julian, sinking into the passenger seat.

"No," replied Logan calmly. "That's because the last time I let you drive my car, you almost crashed it into a truck."

"That was the truck's fault..." grumbled Julian. Logan pretended he didn't hear.

Julian glowered at him and kept glowering until he snapped, "Stop glaring!"

Julian grinned. So he was annoyed, uh? _Great_! Bothering Logan was so much fun...

"I'm not glaring. I'm staring while silently fuming. Big difference."

"Well, then... stop _staring_."

"Don't feel like it."

"Why?" Logan smirked. "Enjoying the view?"

"Not particularly," Julian shrugged. "But annoying you is definitely worth it."

Logan shot him a dirty look as Julian's grin widened.

"Just so you know, I hate you."

.

_I hate your big dumb combat boots_

_and the way you read my mind._

_._

Logan rushed in Julian's Dalton room.

"Jules, can I borrow your - _oh holy crap, what the freaking hell_?"

"Civilized people _knock_ before entering," Julian answered without so much as batting an eye. "By the way, what's it that bothers you so much?"

Logan didn't answer immediately. He stared at Julian with wide eyes.

Julian was wearing a tight black shirt with super skinny jeans and huge combat boots. And he was _damn hot_.

"I-" he said, trying to compose himself. "What - I mean, how... _why_ are you wearing those... those... those stupid combat boots?"

"I'm just trying on a new outfit for a photoshoot. What do you want?"

"I - do you really have to wear them? They're... so... _stupid_."

Julian blinked. Why the hell did Logan care so much about those damn boots now?

He shot a look at the other boy and, realizing what it all was _truly_ about, he smirked. Logan was so _not_ staring at his boots.

"Oh, I understand..." he said softly. "...like what you see, Lo?"

Logan suddenly looked up to meet Julian's gaze. To his horror, he saw a smug grin appear on the other boy's lips.

"Well, that's interesting. So a pair of skinny jeans is actually all it takes for you to shut that huge mouth of yours..."

"Wha - no! It's just... just... I really hate those hideous boots," Logan stuttered.

"Of course you do Lo... and that's why you keep staring at my butt, isn't it?"

"Shut up!"

"Get a hold of yourself, Logan, or I'll have to tell Blaine you practically almost jumped my bones," said Julian grinning even more.

"God, I hate you."

.

_I hate you so much it makes me sick,_

_it even makes me rhyme._

_._

"My Tempestuous friend!" shouted Julian entering Logan's room with a huge grin. "How are you?"

Logan shot him a dirty look from where he was lying on his bed.

"Stop shouting, you dumbass, I have a terrible headache."

"That's why I'm here - to make you feel better!"

Logan rolled his eyes.

"You can only make me feel _worse_," he retorted.

"Ouch! That hurt Logan!" Julian pretended to be mortally wounded. "Your best friend comes here to help you through this terrible illness and all you do is being mean to him? That's just cruel!"

"You're _such_ a melodramatic, whiny primadonna."

Julian grinned.

"But you like me nevertheless."

"I can't stand you."

"Nope, you like me. I know you do. I'm your best friend."

"Believe me when I say I couldn't loathe you more. Now please go, and close the door. Ugh - see? I hate you so much it even makes me rhyme."

.

_I hate the way you're always right,_

_._

"...I told you. I told you it was nettle. But you - no, you couldn't simply listen to me. You had to try and prove me wrong! Happy now that it has stung you? Here, let me-"

Logan pulled his hand back and glared at him.

"When exactly did you become my mother? It's usually Derek the one who-"

"Hey, don't drag me into your stupid fights. Besides, you _do_ now you are just like an old married couple, right?"

Neither Logan nor Julian paid any attention to him.

"Very well," Julian said very calmly. "If you don't want me to help you with that hand, that's fine with me. But I still won the bet. You owe me five bucks."

Logan narrowed his eyes.

"I don't know why I'm still friends with you. I hate you."

_._

_I hate it when you lie._

_._

Julian stared at his phone.

_Where are you, you insufferable primadonna? You said you'd be back by the end of the month. -L_

Julian smiled as he answered,

_Did I? Well, I'm not. You'll have to wait for another week. -J_

He didn't have to wait too much before his phone rang again.

_See? That's why I can't stand you. You're a liar. -L_

_Aww, you miss me, Lo? That's so incredibly sweet. Well, that changes everything. I'll get on the first flight. -J_

When he opened Logan's reply, Julian smirked.

_You're a liar. And I hate you. -L_

_._

_I hate it when you make me laugh,_

_._

Julian was staring at Logan with wide eyes.

"...you're ticklish?" he asked as a mischievous smile appeared on his face.

Logan swallowed.

"...don't you dare, Jules."

Julian moved closer with an evil grin.

"I'm telling you, Jules. Don't you even_ think_ of-" but it was too late, for Julian had already thrown himself at Logan, tickling him without mercy.

"No - _NO! _S-top it! _S-s-stop_!" shouted Logan while trying to get away from Julian, who was laughing harder than ever.

"Y-you... evil..." stuttered Logan. "I h-hate you!"

.

_even worse when you make me cry._

_._

Logan wiped away one angry tear. He hated fighting with Julian.

...well, no. As a matter of fact, he loved it. It had always been their way to show each other... affection, or whatever the hell it was.

But when the fights got serious, and Julian refused to talk to him for days and avoided him like plague - how that was even _possible_? They lived a couple of rooms away from each other, for crying out loud! - Logan hated it.

Jules was his best friend, and having him avoiding Logan for days was not cool.

Logan repressed the urge to rip his pillow and looked at the photo on his beside table. Julian, Derek and a much happier Logan stared back with a grin.

"Why can't you understand you're my fucking best friend and I _do_ care about you?" Logan asked, looking Julian straight in the eyes. "I hate you."

_._

_I hate it when you're not around,_

_._

"Jules!" Logan cried, knocking at the door. "Julian, I'm serious! Open the door!"

No answers.

"_Julian!_" he tried once more. "Listen, I don't know what I've done to you, but whatever it is, I'm sorry, okay? I'm _sorry_! Now open the fucking door and _talk_ to me."

Only silence from the other side of the door.

Logan sighed. He didn't even know why he was doing this anymore. It had been like that for two weeks straight now.

Not only Julian didn't let Logan in, didn't talk to Logan and didn't even_ look_ at Logan, but he pretty much didn't even get out of his room.

Now, Jules had always been a moody primadonna, but this was crossing the line. Logan didn't know what the hell he'd done to him, he actually didn't even know whether _he _was the problem in the first place. He had to be, though. Why else wouldn't his best friend talk to him for two weeks?

_Maybe because he's sick and tired to put up with all your shit and doesn't want to be your friend anymore,_ said an annoying voice in Logan's head.

"_No_!" hissed Logan, punching the door. "_Jules!_ Come talk to me_ right now!_"

But no one answered.

"Fuck you," Logan muttered, throwing another punch. "Fine, you don't want to be my friend anymore, I got it. I fucking hate you."

_._

_and the fact that you didn't call._

_._

Logan wanted to leave Julian alone, but he couldn't bring himself to do that.

He couldn't.

He couldn't lose Jules.

So, since Julian refused to let him in his room and talk to him, he had sent him at least three hundreds messages in the last two days.

Logan glanced at his phone only to discover that no, none of those messages had been answered yet.

But he knew Julian was getting them.

How he knew? Derek came to his room just a few hours ago, asking him to leave Julian alone, telling him he needed time.

Of course Julian was still talking to Derek. It was _Logan_ the only one who was left out of everything.

_Why is it always Derek?_ he asked himself. _Why can it never be me?_

But deep down, he knew why. He knew Derek had always been a better friend to Jules than him.

His phone vibrated, and Logan instantly looked at it, his eyes full of hope.

_New message_

He opened it with trembling fingers.

_From: Kurt Hummel_

Every other moment, he'd be unbelievably happy to get a message from Kurt. Now, he threw the phone against the wall.

_Screw it_, he thought, angrier than ever, breathing heavily.

He sat on the bed, sinking his head into his hands.

"Fuck, Jules, I hate you," he breathed. "I hate you so much."

_._

_But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you,_

_not even close…_

_not even a little bit…_

_not even at all._

_._

Parent's night.

Now, Logan figured Julian wouldn't have been able to stay his room tonight. But why did he look like he was enjoying himself all of a sudden?

Why was he laughing with the stupid blonde boy who... wait a second.

Logan stared at him with narrow eyes.

Wasn't... wasn't that Clark Sawyer, Julian's castmate?

What was he even doing here and... _why was Julian smiling that smile of his now_?

Who was Clark Sawyer to get that smile, when Logan, Julian's _best friend_, had been denied that smile for three weeks?

Logan completely blacked out. He went straight to them and grabbed Julian's wrist.

"Hey!" Clark protested while Julian stared at him with wide eyes. "What do you think you're doing?"

Logan ignored him completely.

"You are talking to me_ right now_," he said, looking at Julian straight in the eyes.

Julian glared at him.

"Why would I do that?"

"Listen, I don't know how many times I have to tell you I'm _sorry_ and you didn't even tell me what the hell I've done to you yet!"

"Maybe this is not about you, maybe it's not _always_ about you, did this thought occur to you, you self-absorbed prick?"

"Then I _demand_ to know why on earth you haven't talked to me in three fucking weeks!"

"Maybe I'm just sick and tired of having to put up with your shit."

"This just proves I was right, it _is_ about me."

"I already told you this is _not_ about you!" snapped Julian. He looked at Logan's hand. It was still holding his wrist. He said coldly, "Let go of me."

"The _hell _I will!"

"Let. Go. Of. Me." repeated Julian. "I don't want to talk to you!"

"Very well!" Logan snapped, letting go of Julian's wrist. "Fuck you, you goddamn primadonna. I-"

"-hate me? Yes, I believe you've made it very clear over these past three years. Now go away."

Logan's mouth fell open as he looked at Julian in shock.

"I...wasn't about to say that," he stuttered.

"Oh, really?" asked Julian with a sarcastic smile. "What was that, then?"

"I..."

Logan didn't know what to say. Because, yes, that _was_ what he was about to say. That he hated him.

That was not the truth, though.

How could he ever hate Jules?

Beautiful Jules who always stood by his side, who put up with his crap without ever complaining, who could light up the entire Ohio with that smile of his?

No, he didn't hate him.

Julian might be a bit of a pain in the ass sometimes, but he was generous, brave, the best friend anyone could ever ask for, and Logan didn't hate him, not even in the least.

The opposite, actually, he-

Logan's eyes widened as the realization came.

"What?" Julian asked as Logan kept looking at him with a strange look in his eyes. "You can't stand me? You loathe me? Despise me? Which word would you prefer to use to express your feelings towards me today, Your Majesty?"

"...I...I _love_ you."

* * *

><p><strong>AUTHOR'S NOTES<strong>

I actually wanted to write Rane. Or Wevid.  
>But, of course, the moment I started writing, Jogan inspiration <em>had <em>to struck.  
>God, Jogan, how I <em>hate<em> you!  
>...not true, I love you :D<br>The poem you can read through the story is the one from "10 things I hate about you", which I just finished watching for the fifth - or was it sixth? - time. I blame Heath Ledger. Anyway, I just thought it was really Jogan-ish *-*  
>Let me know what you think, most especially about the grammarspelling.  
>Thank you:)<p>

Hugs&Butterfly Kisses,

PurpleSummer -3


	2. Julian

Hi everyone! :)

So, second (and last) chapter to "Hating You, Loving You". Jujubear's POV this time!

Basically what you'll read are the follow-ups to all the scenes from the last chapter. I left the words of the poem so that you can recognise the scenes...

Okay, I really suck at descriptions and stuff, so... yeah, enjoy ;)

And watch out for the second scene, that's all for my Tumblr fellows ;D

DISCLAIMER: Nope, still not mine.

-Oh, I almost forgot: ep 26 still wasn't up when I started this, so just pretend you haven't read it while reading this, okay? x)

* * *

><p><strong>HATING YOU, LOVING YOU<strong>

**_I hate the way you talk to me,_**

**_and the way you cut your hair._**

_._

_"You're insufferable - I hate you."_

Julian burst out laughing.

"It's true though," he said. "You _are_ tempestuous. And you act as if you were Her Majesty the Supreme Queen of the Galax - _hold on a second_!" his eyes sparkled mischievously. "That's it. That's who you are. _Your. Tempestuos. Majesty_. This is so perfect..."

"Ugh - don't you dare! Don't you even - _fucking_ - try, Larson!"

"Aww... look at the Little Prince being all touchy about his new nickname..."

Logan just stared.

"...what did you just call me?"

"Little Prince?" Julian raised an eyebrow. "Why do you - wait." he scrutinized Logan for a long moment. "You _like _it, don't you?"

"What - _that's absurd_!" denied Logan. "...I love that book though."

"_Oh my god you like that nickname!_ Oh my god, I'm _never_ gonna call you by any other name ever again." Julian was laughing hysterically.

"Don't you -" started Logan, all red. But suddenly he stopped and started to smile. "You know what? Go ahead."

Julian immediately stopped laughing and looked questioningly at Logan.

"What?"

"You heard me - go ahead. Call me by that name every time you feel like it. Really, I don't mind. But think about it - if I'm the Little Prince, what does that make you?"

"What... what do you mean?" asked Julian, taken aback.

"_I_ may be the Prince... but you Jules, you insufferable, whiny diva, you are the Rose."

"I am _not_!"

"Of course you are," Logan answered. His grin widened. "And if you do as much as calling me by that ridiculous nickname in front of anyone, I swear every tabloid in the country will know Julian Larson encourages his best friend to call him _Rose_."

"You wouldn't dare!"

"I most definitely would," Logan smiled.

Julian stared at him for a long moment.

"Fine!" he finally said. "But I hate you."

.

**_I hate the way you drive my car,_**

**_I hate it when you stare._**

_._

_"Just so you know, I hate you."_

Julian smiled. Oh, Logan was _really_ annoyed.

And now he could even stare at him for a little while without worrying about the consequences. Wonderful. That practically made his day.

Logan shot him another brief look and Julian noticed he seemed to be having a hard time holding back a smile.

Julian smirked.

"You don't seem as annoyed as you claim you are, Wright... like having me staring at you?"

"Yes," Logan said sarcastically. "I'm so flattered great Julian Larson finds me interesting enough to even _look_ at me."

"Mine's not _interest_, I'm actually staring in awe, you're the most horrendous thing I've ever laid my eyes on."

Much to Julian's surprise, Logan didn't bat an eye.

"Well, _maybe_ it's not that I'm flattered. Maybe I just can't wait to get home to go on tumblr."

Julian looked like a child opening his Christmas presents.

"...you go on tumblr?"

Logan just shrugged.

"From time to time. And yes, Derek knows, so no, you can't blackmail me."

Julian was clearly utterly disappointed.

"Umpf - what's tumblr got to do with anything anyway?" he pouted.

"Oh nothing," Logan said. But his smile seemed to disagree. "...I just can't wait to see the posts of those two girls in that car." He gestured towards a point behind Julian.

Julian turned around to see a couple of girls looking at him and positively flailing. This sucked for several reasons:

1. He couldn't stare at Logan anymore.

2. One of the girls was about to take a picture of him, he was too shocked to give her his signature smile and he wasn't even wearing his beloved sunglasses.

3. He couldn't stare at Logan anymore and that was a freaking _tragedy_, okay?

He heard Logan laughing behind him.

"Omigodyouguise, you'll never believe what happened to me and my bestie today!" he said, imitating a fangirl squeeing. "Julian Larson was in the car next to us! At first he didn't see us because he was busy staring at his heaps more attractive friend, but then he turned around and I took a photo of his dumb expression! Omigod omigod I can't believe it, I'm gonna die right now, he's so hot! He's so perfect I just want to cry! JULIAN LARSON, I WILL MARRY YOU AND HAVE YOUR CHILDREN. _**BEST. DAY. EVER.**_"

Julian looked as if he was about to murder him, while Logan just kept laughing hard.

Julian wanted to come up with a witty remark, he really wanted to, but right now there was actually just one thing he could think of.

"...fuck my life."

.

**_I hate your big dumb combat boots_**

**_and the way you read my mind._**

_._

_"God, I hate you."_

Logan was unbelievably red and most obviously embarrassed, and Julian was absolutely delighted.

"Of course you do. It's because you know you can never have me."

"Stop it."

"Why should I? It's funny!"

"Julian!_ Stop. It_."

"...I must say, I rather like having your boxers in a knot for once, Lo... you're so heartbreakingly cute when you're embarrassed!"

"You -_ ugh_. That's it. I'm going away."

Logan headed towards the door.

"Can't stay here any longer without jumping my bones, right?"

Logan froze with the hand on the doorknob. He shot Julian a very dirty look.

"If you were gay, or at the very least bi," he muttered under his breath. "I'd wear those hideous skin-tight jeans Michelle bought me and then we'd see _who_ would have the other's boxers in a knot."

Julian just stared while Logan got out of the room and shut the door behind him.

.._.Logan in skin-tight jeans though_.

.

**_I hate you so much it makes me sick,_**

**_it even makes me rhyme._**

_._

_"Ugh - see? I hate you so much it even makes me rhyme."_

"Okay," Julian said. "I'll go then."

He rose and headed for the door.

"Wait!" Logan finally said.

Julian looked at him questioningly. "...where are you going?"

"Since you find me so annoying, I really don't see why I should stay here."

Logan sighed.

"Well... I suppose if you stayed for a couple of minutes, it'd be okay..."

Julian grinned.

"Aww... I was right then! You _do_ like me!"

Logan glared at him.

"_Liking_ you is a rather strong word. Let's just say I don't completely despise you."

"Such a sweetie, as usual... what would I ever do without you? And most importantly, what would you do without _me_?" Logan rolled his eyes and Julian laughed. "Never fear Lo... I'm here to take good care of you!"

"Of course, you'll stay here, make sure I take my medicine and hold my hand like any good Mom would do," said Logan sarcastically.

"I can hold your hand if you want to, my mortally ill friend!" Julian said, grabbing his hand before Logan could protest. "Just don't tell Derek."

"Why? If he was to get terribly jealous because you've had this privilege I'll let him hold my hand too. I'm all for sharing the love."

"It's not his jealousy I'm worried about. ...and I_ really_ didn't need to know about your new sharing the love policy, thank you very much. It's just that the last time we held hands D called us a _couple of spoiled Beverly Hills brats_"

Logan shrugged.

"He calls us an old married couple every time we argue, but you don't seem to care," he said. Then he grinned. "But maybe that's just because you know that's a little bit true."

"It's_ not_!" protested Julian.

"Yes it is. I mean, it's not like it's my fault, obviously... you, on the other hand, behave like an annoying old woman, act all bossy and try to control me as if I were your husband."

"That's absolutely _not_ true!"

Logan raised an eyebrow.

"Last week you made a scene just because I fed Sonic one hour late."

"Well, _of course_ I did! I asked you to do one simple thing at one precise hour _just this once_ and you didn't! Sonic could have starved to death! And all because you never listen to me!"

"He's perfectly fine, Julian, don't be such a drama queen. Besides, he's just a _hedgehog_, for crying out loud!"

"But he's important to_ me_! See? You don't even care about my feel-" he stopped abruptly, horror in his eyes.

Logan stared in amusement as the truth hit Julian - who was still holding his hand - full force.

"Oh god," Julian said, horrified. "We _do_ sound like an old married couple."

.

**_I hate the way you're always right,_**

_._

_"I don't know why I'm still friends with you. I hate you."_

"Well, to be perfectly honest..." Derek said. "It was _you_ who touched that damn thing because you had to_ prove_ something. It's not like Julian forced you to do anything."

"Exactly!" nodded Julian. "It's not my fault if you can't tell nettle from innocent grass. Now give me my money."

Derek scoffed.

"Jules, stop it."

"But it's_ my_ money! I won it!" protested Julian.

"Can't you be the adult one here and let it go?"

"But-!"

"Yes, Larson, do as Mother says." Logan said.

"Oh for the love of - _stop_ calling me like that!"

"I'll stop when you stop acting like one."

"I don't act like-"

"Oh, please Derek... you do. All the time."

"Yeah D..." Julian said. "I hate to break it to you, but Logan's right."

"_Jules_! How can you take his side now?"

"Sorry man... but you can't deny it. This morning you spent three whole hours bugging me until I gave up and put the solar oil on."

"_UV rays can be extremely dangerous!_" protested Derek.

Julian and Logan smirked at each other.

"Aww..." Julian said. "Logan and I are_ so_ lucky! You're the best Mom in the universe!"

"Yes, you'd never let anything bad happen to us!" Logan added.

"Hey Mom,_ Mom_, can we get an ice-cream please?"

"And I want a kiss on my hurt hand!"

"I can do that while Mom goes get us ice-cream!" offered Julian helpfully.

"But you're not _Mom_!" protested Logan.

"...an attractive boy who also happens to be a movie star offers to kiss you and you refuse?"

"Well, it's not like D's all that bad... you've got a point, though. Mother, go get us ice-cream, Julian will kiss my hand."

Derek stared at them with wide eyes. Then he just rolled his eyes.

"Old married couple one minute, kindergarten sweethearts the other..." he muttered. "Just get together already, will you?"

But he left to get some ice-cream.

Logan just laughed.

"You and me together," he told Julian. "As if it was ever possible!"

Julian just smiled, fighting the sudden urge to smash his own head against a wall... or rather, Logan's head.

"...yeah," he said. "Ridiculous, right?"

_._

**_I hate it when you lie._**

_._

**_You're a liar. And I hate you. -L_**

Julian smirked. Typical Logan.

_Aww... I love you too Lo -J_

Julian stared at his phone.

The text was clearly meant as a joke to annoy Logan... and yet, Julian couldn't bring himself to hit the send button.

It was much too close to the truth, to what he wished he could tell Logan... to the one thing he could never confess.

Suddenly, someone knocked at the door, making Julian jump.

It was Nathan, who wanted to know if Julian was up to go study in his trailer.

Julian smiled and told him to go ahead, promising he would have followed in a few minutes.

Once Nathan was gone, Julian sighed deeply, staring at his phone again.

Feeling his heart sinking just a little bit, he deleted the message and headed out of the door.

If anything, hopefully the homework would have freed him from the constant thought of Logan Wright for a little while.

_._

**_I hate it when you make me laugh,_**

_._

_"Y-you... evil..." stuttered Logan. "I h-hate you!"_

But he was laughing.

...not that he actually had a choice with Julian tickling him without mercy.

Julian laughed, delighted. Torturing Logan was pure bliss.

Logan was tackled to the floor, but he seemed to have no intention to surrender. With one fluid movement, he managed to take Julian's shoulders and before the other boy could realize what was happening, he found himself tackled to the floor with Logan on top of him.

Julian stared at him with wide eyes and Logan smirked.

"Not so cocky anymore, are we, Larson?" Logan said, and Julian could do nothing but swallow. "Now, I want you to promise me not to try to tickle me ever again, or I swear there will be consequences."

"Oh, yeah?" answered Julian, praying every saint in heaven he could survive all the sexual frustration he was currently experiencing.

"Yes," smirked Logan. "...I'll kidnap Sonic."

Julian flushed with anger.

"Don't you dare even _think_ of it, don't you dare, Wright!"

"That's up to you. Promise not to tickle me again, and Sonic will be safe." Logan said, leaning much too close.

Julian never knew how he managed not to kiss him.

"..."

"_Do it_, Larson," insisted Logan.

"I..." Julian answered in one shaky breath. "...yes, I promise."

"Very well," said Logan, getting up. "Now, can we please keep studying Math? The test is tomorrow."

Julian sighed and got up, hoping the very _very_ recent drop of his IQ wouldn't compromise the test.

.

**_even worse when you make me cry._**

_._

_"Why can't you understand you're my fucking best friend and I do care about you?" Logan asked, looking Julian straight in the eyes. "I hate you."_

Meanwhile, Julian was in his own room, just as upset.

As much as he enjoyed bickering with Logan, these stupid fights over _nothing_ really sucked. Because not only Julian was actually in_ love_ with the guy, but Logan was his best friend too. On the bright side, at least Logan hadn't thrown him against a wall this time.

Julian wiped away one single tear.

Maybe he should go talk to Logan. Not that he wanted to _apologize_ or anything - he still thought he was the wronged part there... but the last thing he wanted was having to spend the whole week ignoring his best friend.

Julian sighed and got up from the bed.

When he opened the door, he found himself in front of the most amazing view. Logan Wright himself, hand suspended mid-air, clearly about to knock at the door.

Julian's jaw dropped as Logan's eyes widened.

"...hi."

"Hi."

Awkward silence.

Logan shifted uncomfortably and Julian chewed on his lower lip.

"I..." Logan began, not really knowing how to go on.

But for Julian, this was more than enough.

"...I hear the new Pirates of Caribbean movie is out. Want to go to the cinema?"

This time it was Logan's jaw to drop. He stared at Julian in amazement for a couple of seconds. Then he beamed at him.

"Sounds perfect."

"Great. Let's go."

And maybe it was the sight of him smiling like that, or the fact he was actually _really_ going to apologize for once, but Julian found himself falling for Logan a little bit more.

_._

**_I hate it when you're not around,_**

_._

_"Fuck you," Logan muttered, throwing another punch. "Fine, you don't want to be my friend anymore, I got it. I fucking hate you."_

What Logan didn't know was that each and every word he spoke was echoed by a choked sob on the other side of the door.

Julian wanted to let him in and tell him everything, but he couldn't. He just_ couldn't_.

First of all, he didn't think Logan cared that much - he never did after all - and even if he did... well, it didn't really change anything. Whoever his stalker was, she clearly wasn't in her right state of mind, and the_ last_ thing he wanted was Logan in the harm's way. Logan needed to be safe... safe, and oblivious, as usual.

Julian sighed, trying to wipe away his tears. Why did it have to be so damn complicated? Sometimes it was hard for Julian to understand why Logan would complain about not being able to feel anything. Personally, he would have_ paid_ to be numb right now. All this, fear, this despair, this_ love_, this damn love, were too much to handle. And Julian wasn't sure he could do it anymore.

In the meantime, Logan had stopped yelling.

Julian figured he'd probably just given up. It hurt that he did, but it was actually better this way. If anything, he was safe.

Suddenly, his phone vibrated.

_Just thought you might want to know Logan seems to have every intention to sleep in front of your door tonight. -D_

Julian's heart leapt.

_Logan was still there. For **him**._

Careful not to make any noise, Julian stood and walked to the door. He sat down, leaning against it, caressing the wood, wishing he could just open the door and hold Logan in his arms.

"I'm sorry," he whispered softly, one more tear rolling on his cheek. "I'm so,_ so_ sorry. But I can't lose you."

Feeling his heart breaking, Julian replied to Derek's text.

_Tell the damn squid to go away. I don't want to talk to him, got that? -J_

He kept crying silently until he fell asleep shortly after.

What he didn't know was that Logan was almost in the same conditions - even though he somehow managed not to cry - on the other side of the door, and Derek never had the heart to deliver the message.

They slept together that night, each of them oblivious to the other's presence, both sure they had just lost the most important person in their lives.

That night, Julian had nightmares of his stalker finding him, hurting him, killing him even. But in every dream, Logan was always safe. And that was all that mattered.

_._

**_and the fact that you didn't call._**

_._

_"Fuck, Jules, I hate you," he breathed. "I hate you so much."_

Meanwhile, Julian was trying not to fall apart in his room. Quite unsuccessfully so, too.

_Jules, what happened? You're acting weird - L_

"You'd act _weird_ too if a stalker threatened you, you ignorant squid."

_Julian, don't be stupid, I don't know what your problem is, but you need to get out of that stupid room and get a damn life! - L_

"Life? Precisely what I _won't_ have anymore if I get out of my 'stupid room' before the crazy bitch has been found and locked up in some mental hospital."

_JULIAN LARSON, why the HELL won't you talk to me? - L_

"Because I'm in love with you and you won't even look at me while your precious Hummel is around. Happy now?"

_Jules, seriously, I'm just trying to be a good friend here! - L_

"Really? Why, that's such a shocker. You've never done such a thing before. Oh, _wow_, I'm so very lucky, Logan Wright is trying to be a good friend. Yay."

_Julian, whatever I did to deserve this, I'm sorry, okay? So, so SORRY. Just tell me what I did and I'll fix it. Promise. - L_

"You can't. You broke my heart so many times I don't even think it can be fixed at all anymore."

_Fine. If that's what you want I'll leave you alone. I hope this drama you're having is worth losing a friend, stupid brat. You don't want to talk to me anymore? Great. I'm done. You can go die in a hole for all I care. - L_

"Oh, you're leaving me alone? _Finally_. Also, I'm perfectly aware you don't give a shit, no need to stress the concept, thank you very much."

_...please. You're my best friend. - L_

Julian stared at his phone feeling his heart twitching painfully. Deep down, he knew Logan cared for him even just a bit. He and Derek were Logan's only friends, of course he wouldn't want to lose them.

But he would. He would lose Julian, wouldn't he? Apart from the stalker issue... Jules was going to leave Dalton for good, wasn't he? And he was doing that to run away from Logan... there was no way they'd keep in touch. Logan was going to lose Julian and Julian... well, he was going to lose Logan too.

Julian sighed. His phone started to vibrate, informing him one Logan Wright was calling him. For the fifth time in the last two hours. And Julian was going to ignore the call, just like he ignored all the others and all the messages.

Derek had told him it was ridiculous and he should just talk to Logan, but he had agreed to try and get Logan to stop trying to talk to Julian. He hadn't been successful so far.

Julian felt the tears building up in his eyes as the phone stopped vibrating, only to start again a few seconds later. Julian made a frustrated noise and threw the phone on the floor.

"_Why can't you just leave me alone_?" he screamed.

But the phone kept vibrating on the carpet, almost spelling the words Logan had written him.

_...please. You're my best friend._

"I'm s-sorry Lo," Julian broke down. "So terribly sorry. B-but I can't do this anymore. I... I just..." he sighed deeply. "I can't."

_._

**_But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you,_**

**_not even close…_**

**_not even a little bit…_**

**_not even at all._**

_._

_"...I...I** love** you."_

Julian stared at him with wide eyes, feeling his heart racing.

"W-what?"

"I-I..." Logan hesitated and lowered his eyes, looking embarrassed and confused.

"I'll... just give you two a moment..." Clark said before disappearing.

Julian barely noticed him, too busy staring at Logan.

Logan glanced at him and opened his mouth but immediately closed it again.

"I..." he finally began. "I don't even know why I... just forget it. I... sorry." And made to go away.

But before he managed to take even just one step, he felt a hand gripping his wrist.

"Wait," Julian said.

Logan turned around to see his friend looking at him in confusion.

"Why... why did you say that?"

"Jules I-"

"Did Derek tell you something? Is this some... some kind of _plan_ to make me stay?"

Logan looked at him confused.

"Told me? What are you talking about? What's Derek got to do with this?"

Julian stared speechless.

"You... you don't know?"

"Know _what_?"

Logan looked at Julian expectantly, but the actor seemed to have lost the ability to talk.

Finally, Logan made a frustrated noise.

"This is so _stupid_! How the hell am I supposed to know what's on your mind if won't _talk _to me?"

Julian glared at him.

"Why should I?" he asked dryly "What? Are you telling me now you suddenly _care_ about me when you never gave a fuck for three years?"

Logan's eyes lit up with rage.

"What the fuck is this supposed to mean? I care and you know it!"

"Oh, really?" Julian retorted sarcastically. "Because it doesn't seem to me."

"You heard what I said before? Because, damn it, I _meant_ it!"

Julian gaped and stared at Logan, speechless. He didn't need to ask what Logan was talking about.

"B-but," Julian finally managed to choke out. "You're in love with Kurt..."

Logan shook his head, looking more confused than ever.

"I..." he trailed off, frowning. He closed his eyes for a moment, then he locked eyes with Julian, dead serious, looking at him intensely. "I don't know;" he said. "It's confusing for me too. I didn't plan it, Jules, I never thought I'd..." he sighed, running a hand through his hair. "All I know is that I don't want to lose you. You're my best friend and... I'm sorry if I never showed you enough, but I _do _care about you. And... I know you're straight and everything but-"

"What if I'm not?" Julian cut him off.

Logan stared at him with wide eyes.

"I... I beg you pardon?"

"I'm... I'm not straight. Never was. I'm bi, Lo. Bi and..." Julian sighed, then smiled a little. "and completely in love with you since freshmen year."

"Fresh - that _three years_! And all this time you -"

"You just... always seemed to have someone else on your mind. Derek's been trying to talk to me into telling you for weeks, but I... I never thought it could make any difference. You never seemed to really look at me." Julian shrugged, as if it was not big deal.

Logan knew what he had to do.

Because, dammit, this was _Julian_. Julian, who had just told him he was in love with him.

Logan knew what he needed to do now.

So he did it. He pulled Julian close and kissed him, smiling on his lips, playing with his hair with that stupid, much too long cut.

Julian held him tight and kissed him back, feeling a very odd feeling in his chest. He suspected it was happiness.

It wasn't as if everything was absolutely perfect. There were still his stalker and a hundred more issues that needed to be dealt with. Only, not right now.

Just for this moment, he was Logan's and Logan was his, and reality could wait for just a little bit longer.

* * *

><p><strong>AUTHOR'S NOTES<strong>

Royal Hippogriff, I'm glad I finally published this. This took time :S  
>I really hope you liked it, let me know! :)<br>_**Also, this little thing is dedicated to the most amazing person I know. My sister, itstimetobattlemydemons on tumblr. I love you :) -3**_

Hugs&Butterfly Kisses,

PurpleSummer -3


End file.
